Pizza Pipeline


Pizza Pipeline cover

There is one very good reason to get wings from Pizza Pipeline. With them, you get a large tub of Litehouse ranch dressing. Now, I'm usually not a fan of ranch, but if I was going to use it for a salad, I'd get it from Litehouse, and the tub you get with Pipeline's wings can go a long way as far as salads are concerned.

Sadly, that's about the only positive thing I can say about these wings.

To call them atrocious would be a compliment they don't deserve. The chicken is of a quality I wouldn't feed to a dog, and I'm pretty sure I shaved a year or two off my life eating it. Is it actually chicken? Lord knows, but there is meat somewhere under the layers of fat, and extensive DNA testing might reveal the animal it is, if you so feel inclined to do the research.

As for the sauce, I can only speculate that watered down ketchup is Pipeline's weapon of choice. It's hard to say, as the minimal amount they use really taste like very little, and is overpowered by the fatty flavors.

I would call these wings crap, but that is an insult to fine purveyors of crap. This is just awful. Horrible. No-one should have to eat these wings. So don't. You do have a choice, and this time I took a bullet for you.