Spokane, a town without ascots

It's a situation we've all found ourselves in: We're hitting the town, be it for a dinner or a super secret underground event, and we need to accessorize to look the part. But what does one wear? A tie? Too obvious. A cravat? Too Louis XIV. A bowtie?! To quote David Sedaris: "A bowtie announces to the world you can no longer get an erection."

So what's left? The ascot! Classy, classic, and good enough for Cary Grant, the ascot sets you apart in any social situation. That is if you can find one.

Now granted, the Northwest in general might not be the most crazily exciting place as far as clothing goes, and that's fair enough. But I was shocked and outraged to learn that Spokane does not have one store that carries ascots. Macy's, Nordstrom, nada. Not even at Anderson & Emami. It was, in fact, the clerk at Nordstrom that informed us that as far as he knew, there was only one store that carried them in the state of Washington, and that was in Seattle.

This I find a little bit sad, and having to go on the web to find an ascot seems like waste to me. Surely a city of a few hundred thousand could support a decent ascot selection?

So. If Spokane wants to set itself apart from cities like Seattle and Portland -- and I hope to god that is the case -- I really think it's time to make this an ascot wearing town. It must be possible to achieve this. Go to any El Corte Ingles in Spain, and they have shelves of ascots. (As picture above illustrates.)

I mean, what better way to celebrate the new Nectar tasting room than proudly hanging out wearing an ascot?